Throughout her life, she would often pick up a paint brush, colored pastels, or redecorate her home with colors of every shade, pillows and blankets, craving to create in one way or another. Rearranging furniture in the late hours of the night once the children were asleep, nurtured the need for change and newness in her life. With little time and meeting the needs of every other person, her career, family, friends, community, creativity was left on the back-burner simmering away. But, deep down, creativity was the calling of her soul. The story already written, the path previously chosen, waiting, just waiting in the wings to burst forth like tulips in Spring.
This is the story of most people born on this earth. Our own gifts and our true calling pushed away in order to fulfill the needs of others. The Universe is patient and creates something called divine timing, something we long to contemplate and understand. Travelling along, experiences, relationships, people and places, are guideposts pointing out new directions, roads not yet traveled, bringing people into and out of life. The mind begins to question, the philosophy of life, dynamics in relationships, the reason we are here. The universal question of every human being, why? And when we are not paying attention to the signs laid out before us, listening to our intuition and heart, or holding on for dear life to what we know, afraid of change, the universe instead acts on our behalf, ripping away all we thought we knew. Finally, throwing us head first onto the path we were meant to follow, the ego sometimes a little bruised and shaken.
Lying in her bed, half asleep and awake she hears a voice commanding, “Get a camera”, and for the first time she listens, hears, understands, does not question. Arising, she seeks out this item she has long thought about, yearned for, pushed away. With courage she requests the camera as a Christmas gift no longer worrying about cost, need, deservedness, simply following the knowing from somewhere deep inside of herself. Christmas morning it is there. The beginning of something new. The beginning of finding herself through the lens of the camera. Leaving judgement, the opinions and expectations of others behind, the new journey begins. She has found the courage to pick up this intriguing medium, the strength in the hands that once nourished others will now begin to nourish herself.
The first step in the journey of coming to know ourselves lies in listening, the quiet space between our logical minds and what we feel is our truth. The space between our thoughts and words. Trust me, it is there just waiting for you to acknowledge its presence. For you to put your own needs first, to try to overcome your guilt, need for approval from others, comparison and judgement of self. To pick up something that has been calling you, plucking your heart-strings, returning to your mind time and time again, perhaps for years. To recognize the deep knowing inside of your soul that this will bring you joy, happiness, purpose. Fulfilment. The courage to look through the lens of your own eyes, the window to your soul. To trust your own voice, your own knowing. The first step is all it takes to begin your journey. You will find your way forward, sometimes falling many times along the way. That’s OK. Get up, dust yourself off and keep on going. You will get to your destination and you will be forever changed, enlightened. You will find yourself. Isn’t the journey of yourself worth it?
Through the lens of the camera, she came to understand her experience and respect for nature. The interplay in our world. The beauty of sight and sounds that it brings each and everyday. How nature calms and grounds our minds. Brings us into presence. The pictures she took brought her to new places, new understandings, new beauty. Through the lens of the camera she came to understand she had a gift. A gift that enables her to experience the world differently, a vision that brings a new understanding. Through the lens of that camera, came the courage to pick up a pen and write, a paintbrush to paint, a voice to speak the truth of her soul. To acknowledge that like everyone on this planet, we see the world through our own eyes, reflected back to us through the mirror of our relationships, our experiences, our own reality. She has come to know her gifts and to share them with the world. She knows herself. She knows the calling of her soul and lives it, breathes it, shares it. The truth of who she is has set her free.